Not A Friend in the World

GOP Cocksucker #433 (DAN MAES) is even having his Teabagger buddies abandonining him.

After slapping the shit out of GOP Cocksucker #500 (SCOTT McINNIS) to win the GOP Cocksucker gubernatorial primary because McInnisd got himself embroiled in a plagarism scandal for which he was paid $300,000, Maes expected to get the endorsementa of the party faithful, which he did...at first.

Then all the weird shit became known to the voters and pretty soon Maes couldn't talk about any of his ideas for the state, assuming he had any. He could only talk about...well...Dan Maes.

As in, did he really think the program to encourage people to ride bicycles around Denver was a plot by the United Nations?

And the latest one, how come you told everyone you used to be an undercover cop when you never were?

Episodes like these have caused more and more GOP regulars like ex-Sen. Hank Brown to take back their endorsements. Now even his fellow teabaggers, seeing a statewide bloodbath looming in Colorado, have asked him to step down.

First was Leslie Hollywood, the director of the Northern Colorado Teabaggers. Then came Teabagger activist Janet Rowland, Evergreen/Conifer Tea Party co-coordinator Connie Bierkan, Western Slope Conservative Alliance president Jennifer Bailey, R Block Party co-founder Nikki Mata, Lu Busse, the chair of the 9.12 Project Colorado Coalition and now GOP Cocksucker #535 (KEN BUCK) the GOP Cocksucker senatorial candidate and Teabagger that beat GOP Cocksucker #410 (JANE NORTON) the establishment candidate that distinguished herself for running away from the press when they started asking question about her lobbyist background. All of them have left Maes high and dry.

Maes stubbornly tweets he is not going to quit. Even though the head of the Colorado Republican Party, GOP Cocksucker #423 (DICK WADHAMS) fervently wishes he would, telling the Denver Post, "He has nobody left."


Sixty days before the election, John Hickenlooper, Maes' opponent, leads him by 11 points and rising.

With thanks to the Denver Post, Westword and TPM Muckraker.

S. Olson