When In Doubt, Cry Like a Little Girl - #271

This is probably the main reason I decided to transfer the posts on the blog 'The GOP C*cksuckers (Part II) to the original blog on the GOP Cocksuckers. It was just too much fun to lose.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009
When In Doubt, Cry Like a Little Girl - #271
#271 DAVID HOSSEIN SAFAVIAN,
FORMER CHIEF OF STAFF OF THE UNITED STATES GENERAL SERVICES ADMINISTRATION (GSA)

When the GOP cocksuckers started getting their hands caught in the cookie jar, their first instinct was to resign and get it off the front page.

Not David Safavian.

While others were pleading guilty, Safavian decided to fight in court. He'd been charged with lying about accepting a golfing trip to Scotland from GOP Cocksucker #47(JACK ABRAMOFF) lying to GSA inspectors about accepting the trip,lying to the Senate investigating the allegations and trying to obstruct both the Senate and GSA's investigations. This was his good name they were talking about and he wasn't going
down without a fight. He was a member of the Bush adminstration, dammit.

The ink was barely dry on Safavian's resignation when the FBI arrested him. Well, what could they do? Safavian's reasoning went. It was his word against theirs. On the witness stand, Safavian said Abramoff had never gotten any special treatment from him and he'd paid $3,100 for that golf trip, which should have covered his expenses.

The jury listened carefully to him then went out to consider the evidence, part of which was a big stack of e-mails that showed Safavian and #47 were trying to make a killing in goverment property. Another piece of evidence was testimony by GOP Cocksucker #52 (NEIL VOLZ), former chief of staff to GOP Cocksucker #51 (EX-REP BOB NEY). #52 was a partner in the scheme and the FBI had already had him by the
short hairs. Because he's a GOP Cocksucker,Volz immediately rolled on everyone he could think of in hope of getting a lesser sentence.

One of those people he rolled on was Safavian.

When the jury came back, their verdict was guilty, guilty, guilty. Safavian was flabbergasted. They couldn't do this. He was a member of the BUSH ADMINSTRATION...well, he's just resigned but hey, he'd FOUGHT them, dammit. He hadn't pled guilty. They were supposed to GO AWAY like the scum they are and the jury was supposed to meekly give up and go away too. Why instead, they'd actually
found him guilty! How outrageous!

Safavian appealed the decision. No dice. When he appeared in front of the sentencing judge, a bewildered Safavian bawled like a hooker new to the street who'd gotten swept up in a police dragnet.

The crying worked, sort of. Safavian only got 18 months. The prosecution had asked for 35. The best part was that Safavian's conviction had put the Abramoff affair inside the White House.

[UPDATE: It wasn't like we walked away empty-handed. We got to bankrupt Safavian, and take his law license away from him forever, just like the GOP cocksuckers tried to do to Big Bill.

[Safavian has to spend a year in the slammer after getting convicted a SECOND time in 2009 because the first case was ruled to have been tried improperly.]

S. Olson