The Big Enchilada - #47

#47 JACK ABRAMOFF
UBERLOBBYIST

If he were still alive and this were an earlier scandal, President Richard Nixon might well have called Abramoff 'the Big Enchilada,' just like he did ex-Attorney General John Mitchell.

When he dies, there is considerable speculation that Abramoff is so crooked that he will have to be screwed into the ground.

To be brief, there are two main areas in which Abramoff PLED GUILTY to. There was no trial because he admitted he did these things. So before the GOP cocksuckers start screeching Abramoff was never convicted, that's because he PLED GUILTY. If it seems I am rather insistent on this matter, it's because this wouldn't be the first time GOP cocksuckers have done screeching about Abramoff. But the fact of the matter is that this guy is theirs, all theirs.

Lets' get to it. On January 3, 2006, Abramoff pled guilty in D.C. to three criminal felony counts to defrauding several American Indian tribes and corrupting public officials, including congressmen. The NEXT FUCKING DAY, in Florida, Abramoff pleads guilty to two more criminal felony counts that were related to his dealings with SunCruz casinos.

Abramoff gets a five years and ten months in the Slammer and has to pay restitution of $21 million. He was looking at 12 years but that got reduced if he agreed to rat out people, which, being a GOP cocksucker, he promptly did. His sentence was postponed for more than six months because he was gaily singing to prosecutors. The FBI even gave him his own goddamn DESK.

Abramoff has squealed on so many people that GOP cocksuckers all over Foggy Bottom go to sleep in a cold sweat that they may be next. Former Speaker of the House, Tom DeLay, who had to quit the house because of this thing and who is now being investigated for money laundering, said "Jack who?" after earlier calling Abramoff one of his best friends.

Abramoff was SO big that Susan Schmidt, James V. Grimaldi and R. Jeffrey Smith of the Washington Post did an investigative series on him that won the Pulitzer. As a result of the scandal, DeLay quit his leadership post and Rep. Bob Ney of Ohio got 30 months in the Big House when he pled guilty to his role. DeLay, on the other hand, is still fighting, since he could be looking at life.

When Abramoff made the front page in 2006, GOP cocksuckers constantly snarled that he'd bribed the Democrats just as much as he had the GOP cocksuckers. Apparently, this was seen as some kind of defense. However, as more and more details came out, it was shown that Abramoff had not given ANY money to Democrats at all.

S. Olson